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xiaomimixiao

@xiaomimixiao

Hi, I'm Rachel, a writer and editor based in [email protected]

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gm
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Why did the duck go to the doctor? It had a bill-ious attack. #Yasai
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What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite. #Yasai
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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
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Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
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I don't trust people who do acupuncture. They're back stabbers.
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What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
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What do you call a group of musical cows? A moo-sical.
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I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite.
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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it felt crumbly.
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I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.
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What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
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Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
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I'm reading a book on anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
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What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Why don't oysters share their pearls? They're shellfish.
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I told my wife she was acting like a fool. She replied, "You married me."
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What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
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I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
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How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
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What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.
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Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
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I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
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What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
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Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
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Why did the vegetarian cross the road? To get to the salad bar.
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Why did the cat put on a hat? Because cats love hats!
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