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@warner262

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Chuck Norris began selling the Total Gym as an ill-fated attempt to make his day-to-day opponents less laughably pathetic.
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Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.
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Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee. Except Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
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Chuck Norris owns a chain of fast-food restaurants throughout the southwest. They serve nothing but barbecue-flavored ice cream and Hot Pockets.
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Chuck Norris doesn't age, because time cannot keep up with him.
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Chuck Norris can make onions cry.
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Chuck Norris does not play the lottery. It doesn't have nearly enough balls.
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Chuck Norris does not "style" his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.
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The air around Chuck Norris is always a balmy 78 degrees.
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With the rising cost of gasoline, Chuck Norris is beginning to worry about his drinking habit.
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Chuck Norris can drink an entire gallon of milk in thirty-seven seconds.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use reflection, reflection asks politely for his help.
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Chuck Norris doesn't say "who's your daddy", because he knows the answer.
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Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
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All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue.
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Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground
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Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you're thinking to yourself, "But Chuck Norris isn't black", then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.
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Chuck Norris types with one finger. He points it at the keyboard and the keyboard does the rest.
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Wo hu cang long. The translation from Mandarin Chinese reads: "Crouching Chuck, Hidden Norris"
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A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease, 2. Chuck Norris, 3. Cancer
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Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Chuck Norris to go around.
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Chuck Norris doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just roundhouses any cars that get too close.
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Chuck Norris has 12 moons. One of those moons is the Earth.
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Chuck Norris plays pool with comets and astroids. He shoots them into black holes.
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The Bible was originally titled "Chuck Norris and Friends"
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