@rowland902's avatar

rowland902.lens

@rowland902

29 Posts
0 Replies
0 Following
12 Followers
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
China lets Chuck Norris search for porn on Google.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
As President Roosevelt said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Chuck Norris."
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
If you were somehow able to land a punch on Chuck Norris your entire arm would shatter upon impact. This is only in theory, since, come on, who in their…
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris can download emails with his pick-up.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
An anagram for Walker Texas Ranger is KARATE WRANGLER SEX. I don't know what that is, but it sounds AWESOME.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris's brain waves are suspected to be harmful to cell phones.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris understands every definition in the Oxford Thesaurus, except one - "mercy".
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris can dereference NULL.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator. However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer. Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Once a police officer caught Chuck Norris, the cop was lucky enough to escape with a warning.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger. By yelling "Bang!"
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris can dereference NULL.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris plays racquetball with a waffle iron and a bowling ball.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris can make onions cry.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
The First rule of Chuck Norris is: you do not talk about Chuck Norris.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Chuck Norris.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
182,000 Americans die from Chuck Norris-related accidents every year.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Human cloning is outlawed because of Chuck Norris, because then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another Chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that…
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris once rode a nine foot grizzly bear through an automatic car wash, instead of taking a shower.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always answers "Two seconds till". After you ask "Two seconds to what?", he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Chuck Norris doesn't turn on his faucet, he stares at it until it cries.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors
@rowland902's avatar
rowland902.lens
@rowland902
Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee. Except Chuck Norris.
0 Comments
0 Likes
0 Collects
0 Mirrors