pierce229.lens

@pierce229

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If Chuck Norris wants your opinion, he'll beat it into you.

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The word 'Kill' was invented by Chuck Norris. Other words were 'Die', 'Beer', and 'What'.

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Bill Gates thinks he's Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris actually laughed. Once.

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Chuck Norris doesn't use GUI, he prefers COMMAND line.

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Chuck Norris already went to Moon and Mars, that's why there are no signs of life.

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When Chuck Norris was born, he immediately had sex with the first nurse he saw. He was her first. She was his third. That afternoon.

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Chuck Norris doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just roundhouses any cars that get too close.

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Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.

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Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

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Chuck Norris types with one finger. He points it at the keyboard and the keyboard does the rest.

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In an act of great philanthropy, Chuck made a generous donation to the American Cancer Society. He donated 6,000 dead bodies for scientific research.

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Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.

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Chuck Norris got his drivers license at the age of 16. Seconds.

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Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes. He disembowels them.

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Chuck Norris does not need to know about class factory pattern. He can instantiate interfaces.

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&quot;Sweating bullets&quot; is literally what happens when Chuck Norris gets too hot.

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Godzilla is a Japanese rendition of Chuck Norris' first visit to Tokyo.

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Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

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President Roosevelt once rode his horse 100 miles. Chuck Norris carried his the same distance in half the time.

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Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter.

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Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

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Chuck Norris's database has only one table, 'Kick', which he DROPs frequently.

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Chuck Norris's keyboard has the Any key.

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If Chuck Norris wants your opinion, he'll beat it into you.

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The word 'Kill' was invented by Chuck Norris. Other words were 'Die', 'Beer', and 'What'.

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Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

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