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Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked about…
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If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
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An anagram for Walker Texas Ranger is KARATE WRANGLER SEX. I don't know what that is, but it sounds AWESOME.
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Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.
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An anagram for Walker Texas Ranger is KARATE WRANGLER SEX. I don't know what that is, but it sounds AWESOME.
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Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse. Horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
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On the set of Walker Texas Ranger Chuck Norris brought a dying lamb back to life by nuzzling it with his beard. As the onlookers gathered, the lamb sprang to…
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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
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Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations... ever.
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Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
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No one has ever spoken during review of Chuck Norris' code and lived to tell about it.
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the…
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Chuck Norris insists on strongly-typed programming languages.
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Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Chuck Norris to go around.
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Jean-Claude Van Damme once kicked Chuck Norris' ass. He was then awakened from his dream by a roundhouse kick to the face.
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Some kids play Kick the can. Chuck Norris played Kick the keg.
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The First rule of Chuck Norris is: you do not talk about Chuck Norris.
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Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you...Forty seven times.
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Chuck Norris can make a class that is both abstract and final.
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Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris brushes his teeth with a mixture of iron shavings, industrial paint remover, and wood-grain alcohol.
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Every time Chuck Norris smiles, someone dies. Unless he smiles while he?s roundhouse kicking someone in the face. Then two people die.
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Chuck Norris doesn't step on toes. Chuck Norris steps on necks.
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Chuck Norris doesn't believe in Germany.
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The only pattern Chuck Norris knows is God Object.
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Chuck Norris' testicles do not produce sperm. They produce tiny white ninjas that recognize only one mission: seek and destroy.
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Do you know why Baskin Robbins only has 31 flavors? Because Chuck Norris doesn't like Fudge Ripple.
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Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
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