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@nichols289

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Chuck Norris once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.
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Chuck Norris doesn't turn on his faucet, he stares at it until it cries.
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Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
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Chuck Norris's keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
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The US did not boycott the 1980 Summer Olympics in Moscow due to political reasons: Chuck Norris killed the entire US team with a single round-house kick during TaeKwonDo practice.
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Chuck Norris's beard can type 140 wpm.
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Chuck Norris won super bowls VII and VIII singlehandedly before unexpectedly retiring to pursue a career in ass-kicking.
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Chuck Norris does not code in cycles, he codes in strikes.
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Chuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much. Chuck Norris throws down!
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How many roundhouse kicks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Just one. From Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris died before 20 years, Death doesn't have the courage to tell him yet.
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When Chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders.
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Chuck Norris proved that we are alone in the universe. We weren't before his first space expedition.
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Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
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Did you know that Chuck Norris was in every Star Wars movie? He was "The Force".
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Chuck Norris did in fact, build Rome in a day.
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Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever…
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Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
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Did you know that Chuck Norris was in every Star Wars movie? He was "The Force".
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Chuck Norris has volunteered to remain on earth after the Rapture; he will spend his time fighting the Anti-Christ.
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Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble.
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Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
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On the set of Walker Texas Ranger Chuck Norris brought a dying lamb back to life by nuzzling it with his beard. As the onlookers gathered, the lamb sprang to…
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Chuck Norris compresses his files by doing a flying round house kick to the hard drive.
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As a teen, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972…
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Chuck Norris won super bowls VII and VIII singlehandedly before unexpectedly retiring to pursue a career in ass-kicking.
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