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Chuck Norris proved that we are alone in the universe. We weren't before his first space expedition.
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Chuck Norris can install iTunes without installing Quicktime.
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The Chuck Norris Eclipse plugin made alien contact.
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An anagram for Walker Texas Ranger is KARATE WRANGLER SEX. I don't know what that is, but it sounds AWESOME.
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There is endless debate about the existence of the human soul. Well it does exist and Chuck Norris finds it delicious.
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Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
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Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.
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Everybody loves Raymond. Except Chuck Norris.
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There is endless debate about the existence of the human soul. Well it does exist and Chuck Norris finds it delicious.
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Chuck Norris doesn't step on toes. Chuck Norris steps on necks.
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The chemical formula for the highly toxic cyanide ion is CN-. These are also Chuck Norris' initials. This is not a coincidence.
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Chuck Norris could use anything in java.util.* to kill you, including the javadocs.
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Chuck Norris can lock a safe and keep the key inside it.
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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
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Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert.
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Chuck Norris once pissed in a gas tank of a semi truck as a joke - that truck is now know as Optimus Prime.
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A handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that…
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In an act of great philanthropy, Chuck made a generous donation to the American Cancer Society. He donated 6,000 dead bodies for scientific research.
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Chuck Norris can over-write a locked variable.
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As President Roosevelt said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Chuck Norris."
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Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris…
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The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island…
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Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.
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To Chuck Norris, everything contains a vulnerability.
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Chuck Norris is the only person who can simultaneously hold and fire FIVE Uzis: One in each hand, one in each foot -- and the 5th one he roundhouse-kicks into…
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When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score over 8000.
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