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A man once taunted Chuck Norris with a bag of Lay's potato chips, saying "Betcha can't eat just one!" Chuck Norris proceeded to eat the chips, the bag, and the…
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How many Chuck Norris require to screw a light bulb? None, he will screw it all.
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Chuck Norris is currently suing myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
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Chuck Norris doesn't age, because time cannot keep up with him.
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They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.
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Chuck Norris uses tabasco sauce instead of visine.
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Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.
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Chuck Norris can write to an output stream.
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Chuck Norris can instantiate an abstract class.
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Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.
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Chuck Norris's programs can pass the Turing Test by staring at the interrogator.
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Chuck Norris has banned rainbows from the state of North Dakota.
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When Chuck Norris says "More cowbell", he MEANS it.
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After taking a steroids test doctors informed Chuck Norris that he had tested positive. He laughed upon receiving this information, and said "of course my urine tested positive, what do…
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Chuck Norris invented a language that incorporates karate and roundhouse kicks. So next time Chuck Norris is kicking your ass, don?t be offended or hurt, he may be just trying…
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The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
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Godzilla is a Japanese rendition of Chuck Norris' first visit to Tokyo.
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Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.
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Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Chuck Norris to go around.
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Those aren't credits that roll after Walker Texas Ranger. It is actually a list of fatalities that occurred during the making of the episode.
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Chuck Norris' house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
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There is in fact an 'I' in Norris, but there is no 'team'. Not even close.
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There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
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It's widely believed that Jesus was Chuck Norris' stunt double for crucifixion due to the fact that it is impossible for nails to pierce Chuck Norris' skin.
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The 11th commandment is ?Thou shalt not piss off Chuck Norris? This commandment is rarely enforced, as it is impossible to accomplish.
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Industrial logging isn't the cause of deforestation. Chuck Norris needs toothpicks.
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