devine854 (@devine854) • Hey
devine854 (@devine854) • Hey
Publications
- Chuck Norris doesn't daydream. He's too busy giving other people nightmares.
- The last thing you hear before Chuck Norris gives you a roundhouse kick? No one knows because dead men tell no tales.
- Chuck Norris can over-write a locked variable.
- Chuck Norris can write multi-threaded applications with a single thread.
- Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.
- Chuck Norris never has to build his program to machine code. Machines have learnt to interpret Chuck Norris code.
- Chuck Norris was what Willis was talkin' about.
- Chuck Norris does not need to know about class factory pattern. He can instantiate interfaces.
- CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.
- If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.
- On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.
- Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions and have them return.
- There is in fact an 'I' in Norris, but there is no 'team'. Not even close.
- The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.
- Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
- When Chuck Norris was born, he immediately had sex with the first nurse he saw. He was her first. She was his third. That afternoon.
- Tom Clancy has to pay royalties to Chuck Norris because "The Sum of All Fears" is the name of Chuck Norris' autobiography.
- When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people. He walks through them.
- Scotty in Star Trek often says "Ye cannae change the laws of physics." This is untrue. Chuck Norris can change the laws of physics. With his fists.
- Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse. Horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
- The last thing you hear before Chuck Norris gives you a roundhouse kick? No one knows because dead men tell no tales.
- Hellen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.
- Chuck Norris doesn't need a debugger, he just stares down the bug until the code confesses.
- When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score over 8000.
- Noah was the only man notified before Chuck Norris relieved himself in the Atlantic Ocean.
- Chuck Norris can binary search unsorted data.
- All browsers support the hex definitions #chuck and #norris for the colors black and blue.