davis308.lens

@davis308

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Chuck Norris was what Willis was talkin' about.

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Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.

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Knock knock, who's there? Chuck Norris! Chuck Norris who? Sorry, joke is over when Chuck Norris gets involved!

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Most boots are made for walkin'. Chuck Norris' boots ain't that merciful.

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Chuck Norris has to register every part of his body as a separate lethal weapon. His spleen is considered a concealed weapon in over 50 states.

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Chuck Norris doesn't use Oracle, he is the Oracle.

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Tom Clancy has to pay royalties to Chuck Norris because &quot;The Sum of All Fears&quot; is the name of Chuck Norris' autobiography.

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They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody.

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When Chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders.

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Chuck Norris doesn't need a debugger, he just stares down the bug until the code confesses.

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When Chuck Norris works out on the Total Gym, the Total Gym feels like it's been raped.

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When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.

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Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.

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Chuck Norris's keyboard has the Any key.

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Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land.

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Science Fact: Roundhouse kicks are comprised primarily of an element called Chucktanium.

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Chuck Norris is the only man who has, literally, beaten the odds. With his fists.

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Chuck Norris starts everyday with a protein shake made from Carnation Instant Breakfast, one dozen eggs, pure Colombian cocaine, and rattlesnake venom. He injects it directly into his neck with…

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Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

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Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.

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Chuck Norris knows everything there is to know - Except for the definition of mercy.

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Chuck Norris does, in fact, live in a round house.

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The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island…

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A diff between your code and Chuck Norris's is infinite.

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